The energy of permission involves asking for permission, giving others permission and giving yourself permission.
Asking for permission is to offer and show respect to yourself and to the world around you. In asking for permission the telling words to watch out for and to hear fall from your own lips are for example; ‘May I…’
- May I make a suggestion?
- May I make a request?
- May I say what that looks like to me?
- May I feed back what you just said?
- May I tell you how I felt when you said that?
By consciously asking whoever you are in conversation with for permission, rather then force feeding your opinions and advice down their throat, (especially when that conversation could become heated), you allow energy to change. Your friends, family, colleagues will feel listened to, appreciated and respected, just the same as you would.
A side effect of asking for permission is that when you give respect, you get it back.
When you are given permission to say or do something, be bold, speak up, be fair, firm and wise. Remember that asking for permission is not an opportunity for you to dump your feelings on someone else.
May I make a request? – Try it, and see what happens.
Giving others Permission is a wonderful area for learning. Whenever you feel hurt, something isn’t working or going the way you want it to, at some level, in some part of yourself – you have given your permission.
Suspend your disbelief here for a moment and consider that possibility. It could be at a soul level or simply in your daily dealings with an individual who you believe is difficult. In fact,it could be an opportunity to learn about your own behaviour.
Ask yourself ‘What makes this person treat me in this way?’
‘How am I giving permission consciously or unconsciously to this behaviour?’ Notice your self-language ‘He’s been horrible to me’, ‘she treats me badly’, ‘it’s not fair’, ‘it’s not my fault’. This is the victim part of you speaking, the part of you who is giving permission to bad behaviour because you get something out of it. You may get to be able to complain and get attention from others or be able to feel sorry for yourself.
Remind yourself that it’s not personal, it may feel personal and all about you, however, most of the time it is relevant only to the issues the other person is dealing with in that moment. EFT is a tool you can use to rapidly (I’m talking minutes here!) help overcome these thoughts and feelings
More then anything, stop focusing on the negatives. If you believe someone is out to get you, that is what you will see. By changing your thinking, focussing on the positive as opposed to the negative, you change your whole energy. You will instantly become more attractive, both to yourself and other people.
Another aspect of giving others permission happens when you are truly yourself. In the being of yourself, the giving permission to yourself to be fully who you are, those around are released from their cloud of indecisions and paranoia’s. It gives them the courage to take risks, speak up, and think more confidently, to be themselves too.
Giving YOU Permission;
In my experience, and in my work, I have noticed that whatever anyone wants be it money, car, relationship, children, they want it because of how they believe it will make them feel.
How do you want to feel? And what stops you feeling what you really want to feel?
You might want lots of money, not because you want the money itself but because of how it makes you feel. These feelings are called ‘values’. Money tends to bring independence, freedom, choice and security. You might want a big house, a flash car, a round the world holiday and those things are great. However, ask yourself what you want to feel by having these things. Material things are transient, like a summer night or a kiss, but by becoming aware of, and developing the emotions you want to feel by having the car/house/family/money, you have a far greater chance of happiness and control over your life especially when life is stormy.
Do it now – I give myself permission to have/be/feel
…………………
………………………………………………………………………………….
What did that feel like? Is there a part of you that says ‘No’ to what you want?
Notice where you feel any resistance resonate in your body. After all, if you are giving yourself permission to be happy and that feels uncomfortable, then something is out of kilter. Again EFT is a great tool to use for shifting stuff like this.
Sometimes, we have beliefs about ourselves which are limiting to say the least.
For example ‘I’m not good enough to have/be/feel………………………..’
Sometimes, what we are really saying is ‘I don’t deserve to have, be, feel…………’
Here are 2 contracts from you to you. Choose one and sign it. Print it out and stick it somewhere you can see it regularly.
This is a big moment for you, own it, and breathe in this commitment, from you to you because when you make a commitment, the whole universe steps in and conspires to support you, love you and give you what you ask for.
…And Celebrate, because this is where the magic starts to happen!
Contract to Myself, for Myself
I give all parts of me, permission to liberate my soul, to hold my spiritual hand, to heal my pain and to offer me guidance and comfort when times are hard.
I promise myself that I will let whatever has to happen, happen, that I will attempt to accept what has happened, and I ask that my lessons be gentle.
My intention is to break free from the ties that bind me and to realise the potential within me gently, calmly, with integrity and pure love.
And as I sit with my intention and feel the energy of it spreading out beyond the boundaries I have known, as far as the stars and further, I am becoming aware of the truth of that intention, and the knowledge of its possibilities fills me with profound thanks.
I understand that signing this contract will change my life in ways I have dreamed of.
Signed……………………………………………………
Dated……………………………………………………
Witnessed by Penny Waite.
My Contract to Myself
My intention is to create the life I want to live.
I promise to take the actions I need to take in
order to allow this to happen.
The permission I give myself is;
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………
…………………………………………………..
I understand that in the search of this life, I will face joys and challenges and I promise myself that I will remember that all states change and that I am not alone on my journey.
I promise myself that I will ask for the help I need.
I ask that my lessons be gentle.
Signed……………………………………………….
Date…………………………………………………..
When we give ourselves permission, we change energy. Notice the difference in how you feel, however subtle, from before you signed the contract and how you feel now. Do you feel a possibility that it could come true, that hope and inspiration?
Know that as long as you hold the intention, everything is working towards fulfilling it for you. Coincidences, synchronicities, moments of aliveness and pure happiness are coming your way – give yourself permission to accept them with gratitude. You deserve the best whoever you are, whatever you have done or been.